Best-Selling Author Shares Inspiring Life Journey as a Woman with Autism

During a time when women’s stories are being heard more than ever before, Jennifer O’Toole continues to courageously share hers with the world. At 35 years old, O’Toole was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome, part of the autism spectrum. Reframed with new perspective and understanding of her lifelong sensory sensitivities, such as the irritation when clothing tags grazed her skin, and troubles reading social cues, the world finally began to make sense. This life-changing news led her on a path to influencing global conversations and true self-discovery.

“It’s so important to explain what’s going on behind the mask. To make you see what we see,” she explains in her highly acclaimed memoir, Autism in Heels: The Untold Story of a Female Life on the Spectrum.

In the book, O’Toole recalls associating character traits to letters and numbers during her childhood, a phenomenon known as synesthesia. She fast-forwards to her college years at Brown University, and shares a deeply personal experience of a physically and verbally abusive relationship. Despite advancing academically, her life continued to feel complicated. Two months after her wedding, she was hospitalized for severe anorexia.

These difficult and painful experiences led O’Toole to seek continued psychotherapy treatment, which helped her become identified after her children's diagnoses. Now, she is the proud mother of three “Asperkids” and wrote the six-book Asperkids series, which quickly became the best-selling collection in the world for and about people with autism, garnering upwards of thirty awards. She keynotes internationally at some of the industry’s largest events and has become a sought-after resource to experts in the field.

While opening up about her journey of life as a woman with autism, O’Toole frequently uses the term “human spectrum.” Individuals will make statements like ‘she doesn’t look autistic’ or ‘she just seems quiet’ as excuses for not fully understanding one another. Helping prepare society to properly support and accept individuals with autism is one of O’Toole’s many goals. This goal is one with which the Kinney Center for Autism Education and Support at Saint Joseph’s University strongly agrees.    

“Before we are on the autism spectrum, we are on the human spectrum. The world is entirely better when we are helping one another,” says O’Toole. “We are more alike than we realize and my hope is to not exclude anyone from the picture.”

The topic of gender and autism has been at the forefront of discussion in recent years. This topic is gaining support for more research and understanding from the field. Women on the spectrum are often hiding in plain sight, but internally are struggling with eating disorders, self-harm, short-term friendships and social anxiety.

“We are thrilled to have a renowned speaker like Jennifer O’Toole join our program this year to discuss the important topic of women and autism,” says Angus Murray, executive director of the Kinney Center for Autism Education and Support. “The field is known to frequently focus on autism as a predominantly male condition, but we are beginning to learn that may not be the case. Impactful conversation surrounding this topic will greatly benefit the community and be life-changing for individuals.”

O’Toole will share her inspiring personal account at the Kinney Center’s seventh annual luncheon and fashion show on Friday, April 12th. The runway show will feature both neurotypical models and models on the spectrum. All fashions are presented by the Main Line store Louella and proceeds will benefit Kinney Center families through programming that includes summer camps, sports, job readiness, skills development and more.

As a true lover of shoes and glitter, O’Toole explains this fundraising afternoon aligns well with her advocacy goals, “I think my message and love for fashion match up perfectly with the runway show and entire program. After all, life is about playing dress-up and exploring all the many facets of ourselves. Whatever we’re wearing, we’re all finding our footing. That, I say, deserves applause.”